All alone I lay on bed every night
And wonder why life would be so tight
I wonder why too I'm here at first
Nothing seem to cook in my mind at last
But still wonder why life is so tight
I don't wonder for myself alone
I do so for everyone
And ask why they seem not to mind
I met her at night
Near the brothels in the big city
Welding mercenary smiles
To marauders and snakes
She was in a blue miniskirt
And a black skintight
Holding a bottle of black brown sprite
She looked like a been of light
Shining and glowing like a twilight at night
I met this girl Amu who said she loved me
A word that had not heard for a while
Last day was 20 years back
From my mama who has already faded away
Here I feel so atrociously hurt
My heart pains so much
As blood trickles to the ground
I feel she loved me for what I had and not for how I was
Isn't wrong to say there wasn't any love lost
I wonder what a ride she took me on
And make me take an oath
To love someone whom I had known not even a little about
I'm trapped by so much pain and anger inside
That I always wish my parents would have been here by my side
Asking me what is my decide
Besides wiping my tricking sorrow tears
That drops from my eyes along my cheeks
But unluckily to me they ain't yet alive
That's the painful truth that sinks deep in my inside
When I once start to think of them
I have none not even one to lean on nor anyone to call upon
Left alone to fight for my ways
I wish I knew how to pray
I'd pray for prayers to poach a prey
Or those for leading one astray
But drugs seem to be my only way
To cool and keep my pain away
Life has turned to be a lie
Just like the smiles I put on each day
As I pass through the falling rain
Thinking about my fame family
They know outside I'm smiling
But deep in my soul I'm crying
Its outside that I fake for them
Knowing no one could bother to ask me,'what's wrong'
As I was a bull and a roaring stallion
I was strong.
That's the disadvantage of being strong coz no one cares about you,they think one is always strong and okay
There is nothing I can do about it
For I know I'm still loved
Yes,my family still loves me
But my father is angry with me
I never fulfilled our covenant
Oh father,just forgive me,your son
I was betrayed by the fake smile
From my sister near the brothels
